Wednesday, July 12, 2006

It's a cardio-vascular fraud

Into every well-laid plan, a little grief and pain must fall. I have no idea what time we leave for vacation today, and even when we do, it's now a working vacation for my husband.

Remember, hard-working engineers, when you are hired, your employer may give you the standard or better than standard vacation time, but they don't expect you to take it!

I myself was working until past the 9:00 hour last night readying the house for our western-state odyssey.

In the meantime, I received a letter from Frontier Communications saying that I have sufficiently proved my existence and they suspect someone fraudulently opened up an account using my name and social security number. In their view, I am no longer accountable for the expenses incurred.

Here is part of a letter I sent them:

This has been a most distressing month to say the least. Not only is your approved list of residency proof too difficult for an at-home parent/home owner to complete, particularly when almost all our bills are in my husbandÂ?s name, the work you have tasked me with should be FrontierÂ?s own.

The irony is astonishing. You clearly opened an account based solely on one piece of identification, one that you didnÂ?t verify. You then assigned to the victim of the crime (me) a part-time job in gathering three pieces of evidence to suit your satisfaction, including time I spent explaining my situation to the town secretary, the town municipal court, the county and J.P. courts, the town postmaster and anyone else you arbitrarily had on your list of required proof, most of whom were flummoxed as to your request and were, in the end, unable to help me.

IÂ?m sympathetic that Frontier Communications is a victim here too. My advice to you is to seek out further identification when opening an account.

Last week I had my body age taken at my gym, and the fitness consultant had the audacity to rate my cardio-vascular health as "poor." This, after over a year of hardcore cardio work, with the last few months being particularly intensive. I can look at this two ways: 1. I will never achieve good cardio-vascular health or 2. it's an improvement because if I'd been measured six months ago, I would probably have been rated "very poor."

I mulled that over a chocolate sundae from Sonic yesterday, while I should have been at the gym, and a few tortilla chips last night when I should have been abstaining.

...and that's it. The kids are up and the promised pancakes will need to be produced. They won't be as good as Dad's, but with all that syrup, I don't think they'll notice.

Bystander is on holiday for the next few weeks. By all means, keep checking in on me to keep my stats good--just don't expect to stay long. Hopefully, I'll have some good pictures when I return.


Anonymous kim jong-il said...

Vacation - HA! You can flee into exile non-citizen, but my missles will find you!!!!! (Once they actually work ...)

10:00 AM  
Blogger Nancy said...

I'll be wearing my Wonder Woman bracelets to deflect anything you send my way!

12:07 PM  
Blogger Mike in S.A. said...

Don't worry, Kim's just feeling "ronery" again.

1:50 PM  

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