Friday, March 09, 2007

Cocktail playdates!

I have no objection, though I really don't like to drink during the day. Puts me to sleepiness, but of course a segment on Today about a woman who wrote a book called Sippy Cups Are Not for Chardonnay: And Other Things I Had to Learn as a New Mom got a lot of heated emails from people on both sides of the debate. I didn't find the Columbia professor who commented on the segment to be as judgmental as Dr. Helen did. I think she was just trying to stay on point that Mom needs to be able to react to her child in case of an injury or emergency. And unlike one emailer, I think that's usually possible after one or two glasses of wine. The emailer noted that children can fall off of monkey bars or swings. My two-year-old did that three weeks ago and I was cold sober.

The author of Sippy Cups kept stressing over and over to stop pressuring moms--about her behavior, about breast feeding, about working or not--which is a good point, but in the end isn't it up to the mom whether she's going to allow herself to feel pressured?

Dr. Helen warns of the nanny-state culture and urges us to go back to the "martinis and grown-up rituals of yesteryear."

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4 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dr. Helen hit the nail on the head, " And the worst part? It is women doing it to other women. " I've said it a thousand times, women sabotage other women all the time (i.e. the requisite size 2, siliconed stunners, etc.)

Of course when my kids were small it was nothing I considered partaking in because I was just too freaking busy trying to get through laundry, schoolwork, chores and enjoying them. I don't think I'd personally feel comfortable doing the drink and play outings, especially if my kids were small. Some things are just more pleasurable, more relaxing minues the tykes.

My quesiton is: if these mommies really are secure in their feeling its okay for them to have these sorts of play dates, why all the hoopla? Are they trying to convince us? Are they the ones pressuring themselves, feeling guilty, what?

Dana

6:33 PM  
Blogger Nancy said...

Some things are just more pleasurable, more relaxing minus the tykes.

That's precisely how I feel, except when we go out to dinner because there's no escape from the fidgeting, and as fidgeting makes me ancy, a glass of wine helps me to relax.

6:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't think for hot second I was anything spectacular as a mom of youngsters, or even very good at it, but really, do you feel so pressured by stay at home/work, breastfeed/don't breastfeed influeneces that it would lead you to just throw your hands up? I knew what I thought re these sorts of things and just did it. It never mattered to me that much what others thought because I was just too freaking busy! And that's what is somewhat troubling about these mommies - they seem to have too much time on their hands and are therefore too concerned about what others think.

I say, get some mettle and go be the mom!

Dana

7:26 PM  
Blogger Nancy said...

Good advice.

I'll confess to a few voices in my head (who shall remain nameless) when I first started parenting giving me some nagging anxiety, but I'm done with that!

6:46 AM  

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